In many cultures, philosophies, communities, and even families, there are traditions or guidelines in place that support relational healing.  In Judaism there is a ritual of atonement, in AA it's called "making amends", and in a wonderful book by the Arbinger Institute there is process defined as the "Outward Mindset". Regardless of what path any of us chooses, one key to emotional well being and moving forward in life just could be finding a way to look at old hurts with a fresh perspective. Taking personal responsibility is not for the weary, and yet often times is the first step to creating a different outcome.